taitu88 (taitu88) wrote,

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The Hardest Thing....

lol..no..not that


I didn't necessarily think letting him go was going to be easy. I knew it wasn't but..I..just...grrrrr

I cannot stop thinking about him! Not even when I sleep! I keep on dreaming about him... It's like I can't escape no matter what I do. I miss him so much it's ridiculous. And there are so many tempting ways to get in touch with him. i see a cute comment or quote and consider sending it to him before I remember my plan.Or else i hope he will try to contact me I HAVE to let him go..I do...it's for the best it really is. I mean..he doesn't even want to see me. I found it he comes down here on weekends and not once has he tried to reach me. And I can't ask him to come here for me..I still recall what happened last time I made that request (shudders).
but I wish that Marine that was looking at me at the mall had been him (It might have been actually). If it was I finally would have been able to see him after more than three years..and I would have gotten my hug.....

and I would have been able to say good bye..

I just wish letting go wouldn't be this hard.
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